Holding on to my sanity is just another nightly duty. Every denial to the public brings forth a tailspin of insults, threats, and obscenities. My life is threatened over the restroom (not nice) and also for things like, not being able to break one hundred dollar bills. It’s 3am, it is not my fault you need smaller bills to pay the five dollar whore waiting in the car, so her small time pimp doesn’t beat your ass. (P.S. Once a middle aged gentlemen said to me, “I need change, bad, do you see what I’ve got waiting in the car. I have to pay first! Pleeeease.” Since when do you pay first? Whatever. He did not get the change.) According to my nightly visitors I am: ugly, really ugly, fat, stupid, a bitch, a dumb bitch, stuck up bitch, goin’a be a dead bitch, and for someone with low (no) self-esteem, this is not so easy to handle. The first few years, I went home crying, a lot. I simply don’t understand how people can be so mean, as if I personally am the root cause of their miserable lives.